im finally back after not posting for so long. i thought i finally gave up on the blog, but i just feel like posting something whenever the new year comes.
this year wasn't a bad year actually. its just that army is boring, army makes u do a lot of meaningless things. but it wasn't that bad after u finished everything. at least u can look back and say u did many things, however ridiculous, however uncomfortable, whatever nonsense ppl made u do.
all the stuff that i did gave me a sense of calm about everything. its all a cycle: i dread some shit that somehow only my unit seems to need to do, then it turns out less badly as i expected, then i complain and laugh it off once its over. all in all, its actually not that bad, though i wouldn't go so far and say it was fun, kinda.
towards the year end, i'm starting to get alot of free time. probably have watched more anime this year then all the other years combined. i just feel like clearing all the stuff on my list, that somehow seems to grow longer the more i watch haha. but i felt like i gained alot of entertainment, cos like every new anime is more music to put on my phone, as well as something to play on my guitar heheh.
anyway, i guess if i were to compare my life to other ppl (especially nowadays all the instagram photos are like wowz), mine would be quite bland and boring. but i guess i've gotten a small sense of tranquility, through a lot of small achievements and learning how to ignore things i cannot control. and nothing really is that bad since i dont have any real responsibilities whatsoever.
things like getting better in guitar, transposing all my favourite songs, passing my N3 jap and feeling my jap knowledge expanding, having less moments of stress and more retarded moments. it could never compare to those times i had in school, but in a way it has been pretty fun. after all the downs that i had when i first ended up in my unit, nowadays its starting to have alot of ups, slowly but surely.
being bored is like a sort of bliss, because it means u have nothing much to worry about or rush to finish something. and i guess im sort of lucky. i have weekends where i just go to pin's or chee's house to mahjong, lepak, talk about all sorts of nonsense and all. it's kind of the only thing i do nowadays, and it's more than enough to keep me entertained.
this new year is gonna be a year of change. i'd break free from my troublesome, eventful yet tranquil life in army, go on a trip of a lifetime to japan with all the fegs i've spent so long with, learn driving, then enter uni. i really don't know what to expect, but what i've learnt from this whole year is not to think so much about something when u don't have to. it'll all probably come naturally. i guess i have alot of expectations, but i wouldn't be surprised anyway if its completely different from what i think.
anyway, im turning 21 this month. i know its supposed to be a big year, and previously i thought of doing a lot of big things, but now that im so close, im not really expecting anything big. because i dont expect myself doing big things for other ppl, so i really shudn't expect to get big things from other ppl as well. that's how things work. but if possible i wanna have some bbq-sleepover ex-07 style haha, or maybe a day where ppl accompany me to karaoke so that i can sing all the jap songs i want.
and idk, maybe my resolution this year would be the Amagami Challenge haha. nowadays i know i don't really care about getting a gf since im not really that lonely anyway cos of the mahjong gang. and its fun to ship jookee and pin or wong and chee, or just stir shit in general heh. but i guess im still slightly envious of the relationships that have started and lasted till now, it seems like a really blissful thing.
of course its not all good, things won't turn out the way i imagined them to be. im just a little bit despo i guess :P. but yea la, i won't rush into things like i did in school, cos its like super embarassing lolol. just let nature take its course heheh.
ok la that's all for now ba. idk when's the next time im posting, but bye ~~
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